Kapaga: When Nearly Is Never Nearly Enough

Kapaga is a card game that scales very well from two to, say, ten players. It thrives on drinking, bad weather, exceptionalism, and rule-wrangling. Even its name is open to debate.

Long ago Clayfox hosted a most contentious forum called the Kapaga Grayzone, home to battles such as Ace Discards, The Five of Clubs Rule, Queerly Kapaga, and Eights: How Wild? Records of these titanic struggles vanished with the collapse of BlogVoices, but the rules as recorded below are the result of consensus and even one international election.

Of course, anyone who has a problem with the rules as they stand - or, to put it less contentiously, a question about this game - is welcome to comment here.

OBJECT A: To get rid of cards in your hand.

OBJECT B: To be the last to reach more than 2,000 points total.

THE PLAY:

The person with the highest running score shuffles and deals. Misdeal is penalized.

Five cards dealt to each player (7 when there are only two players). Cards may be dealt in any order.

Anyone who looks at his/her cards before the dealer is finished is penalized. “Finished”: first card turned to begin the discard pile.

When the dealer turns over the first card, it is as if he/she had played it. If it is an 8, for example, the dealer calls for desired suit or number.

Play proceeds as in Crazy Eights, except:

THE CARDS

• A - Played along with another card of the same suit. If played
  alone, player must draw a card. An ace is never played on an ace.
• 2 - Next player picks up two cards. Cumulative. A 2 of spades
  may be played on a 5 of spades for cumulative effect.
• 3 - Normal.
• 4 - Normal.
• 5 - Normal, except 5 of Spades, which makes next player pick up five cards, and 5 of Clubs, which causes everyone to pass his or her hand to the right.
• 6 - Normal.
• 7 - Play skips next player.
• 8 - Wild: Player calls for desired suit or another number. Has no power against 2s or the 5 of Spades.
• 9 - All players pass their cards to the left.
• 10, J, Q, K - Normal
• Joker - All other players pick up one card. Player follows with another card. Does not answer a 2 or the 5 of Spades. Only one Joker is used in the game.

SCORING:

Various penalties are assessed during play. When a player goes out, the others count up the number of points they are holding in their hands as follows:

Players reaching over 2000 points are eliminated from play at the end of the hand, not during it. Thus any penalties assessed during a hand, even if they bump a player over 2000, do not instantly knock him/her out.

If a player reaches 2000 exactly, his/her score is reset at 0.

PENALTIES: